Well, today it finally happened…the one thing you really didn’t want. You received a text message breakup from your boyfriend or girlfriend. Now your life really sucks big time and you don’t know what to do! The first thing is, don’t panic. Desperately texting them back will only drive them further away.
I may be a little (or a lot!) old fashioned, but in my book a text message breakup is pretty impersonal and cowardly. Sending a text message to break up a relationship seems to have replaced the ‘dear john’ letter, the breakup note, and even the dreaded ‘we have to talk’ scenario.
So what can you do to try to save the relationship and get it back on track? As I mentioned above, do everything in your power not to appear desperate and clingy. Instead, agree with them that maybe a break is a good idea. That’s really going to make them wonder what’s going on in your head! After all, they just sent you this text message breakup and you’re ok with it?
Now that you have kept your dignity intact, the real work begins. What you need is a strategic plan to get your ex to want you back. To get started on developing your plan you should watch these two videos a friend of mine made. (you’ll need to scroll down the page a little) The methods he uses to save a relationship may be a little unusual, but they work! Don’t let yourself be a helpless victim of text message breakup.
Showing posts with label break up. Show all posts
Showing posts with label break up. Show all posts
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Tips On Survivng A Break Up
Unfortunately, we may all have to survive a breakup of some type. Whether it is the breakup of a relationship or marriage, the aftermath can be devastating and leave permanent scars if not handled correctly. So what can we do to get through it?
Tips On Surviving A Breakup:
Don’t play the ‘blame game’. Blaming only yourself or your former partner for the breakup is counterproductive. Own your mistakes, learn from them and push forward with your life.
Don’t focus on the ‘what if’s’. ‘What if I had done this differently?’ What if that hadn’t happened?’ Dwelling on what might have been will make you nuts, so just don’t go there! We all have things we wish were different than they are, but they are what they are. Things happen sometimes that we have no control over and we just have to do the best we can, learn something from it, and move on.
Don’t give ultimatums to your ex. Giving ultimatums is a form of manipulation and bullying. Even though you might be tempted to try it, don’t. It won’t accomplish what you really want it to, anyway. Ultimatums will only cause resentment towards you and that’s not really what you need.
Don’t beg your ex to come back. Turning into a pathetic wimp or a psycho stalker is not going to help either of you. Getting your ex back because the feel sorry for you is a very short-term fix anyway. Instead of being the object of their pity, try to get their respect for how maturely you are handling your life and the breakup.
Don’t use threats to try to get your ex back. Using threats will only make them more angry and resentful towards you. This isn’t what you want.
Be patient. It took time for the problems to occur and it’s going to take you some time to get over the breakup. Give yourself the time you need to heal and then you can move forward with your life.
Find something that interests you and then do it! Take up a new hobby or revive an old one, start a workout routine at the gym…do something besides sit around and feel bad! Sitting around dwelling on everything that’s happened will make you nuts, so get out of the house and do something. You may not really feel like it at first, but you need to make yourself do it.
And here is probably the best tip of all for surviving a breakup: Agree with your ex that there are problems and that it’s a good idea to take a break. Take an honest look at the reasons for the breakup and see if the relationship could be fixed with a little effort and compromise.
Many times you will find that a relationship can be repaired if you are willing to put forward some effort and give things a bit of time. Allow things to cool off and see what happens. You may find that instead of just trying to survive a breakup, you will be busy rekindling a flame.
Tips On Surviving A Breakup:
Don’t play the ‘blame game’. Blaming only yourself or your former partner for the breakup is counterproductive. Own your mistakes, learn from them and push forward with your life.
Don’t focus on the ‘what if’s’. ‘What if I had done this differently?’ What if that hadn’t happened?’ Dwelling on what might have been will make you nuts, so just don’t go there! We all have things we wish were different than they are, but they are what they are. Things happen sometimes that we have no control over and we just have to do the best we can, learn something from it, and move on.
Don’t give ultimatums to your ex. Giving ultimatums is a form of manipulation and bullying. Even though you might be tempted to try it, don’t. It won’t accomplish what you really want it to, anyway. Ultimatums will only cause resentment towards you and that’s not really what you need.
Don’t beg your ex to come back. Turning into a pathetic wimp or a psycho stalker is not going to help either of you. Getting your ex back because the feel sorry for you is a very short-term fix anyway. Instead of being the object of their pity, try to get their respect for how maturely you are handling your life and the breakup.
Don’t use threats to try to get your ex back. Using threats will only make them more angry and resentful towards you. This isn’t what you want.
Be patient. It took time for the problems to occur and it’s going to take you some time to get over the breakup. Give yourself the time you need to heal and then you can move forward with your life.
Find something that interests you and then do it! Take up a new hobby or revive an old one, start a workout routine at the gym…do something besides sit around and feel bad! Sitting around dwelling on everything that’s happened will make you nuts, so get out of the house and do something. You may not really feel like it at first, but you need to make yourself do it.
And here is probably the best tip of all for surviving a breakup: Agree with your ex that there are problems and that it’s a good idea to take a break. Take an honest look at the reasons for the breakup and see if the relationship could be fixed with a little effort and compromise.
Many times you will find that a relationship can be repaired if you are willing to put forward some effort and give things a bit of time. Allow things to cool off and see what happens. You may find that instead of just trying to survive a breakup, you will be busy rekindling a flame.
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